When the Body Holds What the Mind Has Processed
There are women who function exceptionally well.
They meet deadlines.
They maintain composure.
They lead teams.
They hold families together.
They are articulate, capable, and perceptive.
From the outside, they appear steady.
Yet internally, the body may tell a different story.
Understanding an experience does not always dissolve physiological adaptation.
Performance-Based Coping
Many high-functioning women develop adaptive strategies early in life. Competence becomes stabilising. Productivity becomes protective. Emotional control becomes synonymous with strength.
These strategies are often effective.
However, when emotional activation is consistently overridden in favour of performance, the nervous system does not simply forget the activation. It stores it.
The autonomic system may remain subtly mobilised, even when outward behaviour appears calm (Porges, 2011).
Over time, this chronic low-grade vigilance can manifest physically.
Emotional Suppression and Physiological Holding
Emotional suppression is not always conscious. It may emerge gradually through professional environments that reward composure, relational dynamics that prioritise harmony, or personal standards that equate vulnerability with weakness.
The body adapts accordingly.
Muscular contraction becomes habitual. Breath becomes shallow. Pelvic and lower abdominal tension may develop without clear medical explanation.
This is not dysfunction. It is adaptation.
Contemporary somatic psychology recognises that implicit memory and defensive patterning are encoded physiologically, not only cognitively (Ogden, Minton & Pain, 2006).
The mind may have processed the experience.
The body may still be braced.
Chronic Muscular Contraction
Protective contraction is a survival mechanism. When repeated, it can become a default state.
In high-achieving women, this often presents as:
Persistent tightness in the pelvic floor or lower abdomen
Difficulty fully relaxing
Subtle clenching patterns
A sense of internal pressure
Fatigue despite apparent competence
These patterns are rarely dramatic. They are quiet. Functional. Invisible to others.
Because the individual remains productive, the holding goes unnoticed.
Until it does not.
The Invisible Tension of “Appearing Fine”
One of the most complex presentations in somatic work is the woman who appears entirely stable.
She is self-aware. Reflective. Emotionally intelligent.
Yet her nervous system may not experience the same flexibility that her cognitive processing suggests.
Chronic sympathetic activation, even at low levels can narrow physiological tolerance over time (van der Kolk, 2014). Rest becomes difficult. Softening feels unfamiliar. Slowing down may trigger subtle discomfort.
The body has learned vigilance.
This does not require a trauma identity.
It requires recognition of adaptation.
Integration Beyond Understanding
Cognitive processing is valuable. It provides context, language, and meaning.
However, integration occurs when the nervous system experiences safety in the present moment.
Somatic intervention therefore focuses on:
Gradual regulation of autonomic activation
Increased tolerance for embodied awareness
Softening of chronic muscular contraction
Restoration of physiological flexibility
This process is not dramatic. It is incremental.
Over time, the body learns that it no longer needs to remain braced.
Understanding remains important.
Regulation completes the process.
References
Ogden, P., Minton, K. and Pain, C. (2006) Trauma and the Body: A Sensorimotor Approach to Psychotherapy. New York: W.W. Norton.
Porges, S.W. (2011) The Polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological Foundations of Emotions, Attachment, Communication, and Self-Regulation. New York: W.W. Norton.
van der Kolk, B.A. (2014) The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma. New York: Viking.
